Looooo-uke.... I am your faaaaadaaa......

If you're a fan of the star wars trilogy (original 3) or if you've watched at least final episode (the 3rd movie before the prequels), then you'd know who said this line to whom in which scene. The reason the words came echoing into my mind is because today is (I think so anyway) Father's Day.

When you're a kid, more often than not, you always look at your Dad as a superhuman, able to do at the very least most things, if not all things, that you demand of him. Maybe I'm not speaking for all here, but I assume the majority out there would agree to this statement.

But now that I'm a dad, it's all just bullshit. Speaking of shit, I was planning to 'do' something about my own, but I either forgot a bout it till to late, or just reconsidered at the moment of truth. Then, surfing the net, I found this site. Check it out, and I am sure you'll be satisfied.

Back to the point I was trying to make. I am no role-model father, neither am I even one who can claim to be able to give any kind of advice at all regarding fatherhood, because I know that most of the time I do stuff for the kids with barely a smile on my face, sometimes with moans and groans (focus please) and sometimes even with a bitter look, but I do it nonetheless. On this topic, here's my take.

Fatherhood, is at the very basic level, a responsibility that you just have to take. No questions asked. Same as motherhood, you just do it, no questions asked. You might have a voice in your head questioning your decision or sacrifice, but that's about it. You have no right to bring it up, or even worse use at as if it is justification that your are Father or Mother of the Year. It's all part of the process, even if it uses up other resources. Just like breathing, consciously or otherwise, it must carry on without question. AND you can't claim that you're alive because you did all the had breathing part. It just is. Just do it. Even if it hurts, otherwise you're better off dead, literally....

Anyway, for me Father's Day (and Mother's Day, and all other days like it, such as Valentine's Day, etc) was created by some capitalist joker who saw the potential to make more money, sell more products, etc. It has lost meaning, and got really expensive too. Not that I don't appreciate all the stuff my parents did for me and don't want to buy him gifts, but because even without these 'special' days, they're always heroes to me, no need for a day to remind me about it (eventhough I forget more often that not, but that's besides the point...). Comparing fathers on Father's Day makes no sense, because for sure every Father tries his damned best to provide for the kids. Only difference is, his paycheck, or his physical strength, or some other difference that does not make the playing field level, for those who are doing comparisons. But in the heart, it's all the same. I would like it better if Father's Day was changed to F***er's Day, and on this day, we highlight all the idiotic stuff that father's have done, so the other father's can learn and take pointers on what to avoid doing at all costs. On this day, we curse to idiot dads who give the business a bad name. Then, for the rest of the year, we celebrate our father's like it is that one father's day we now celebrate. How about that?

Anyway, talking about Father's Day and gifts, I've find 2 that I as a father would love to get from my kids, and if the agree with me on the above points, they can buy these stuff for me any day of the year, not restricted to a Father's Day set by some western culture, or whatever. Then again they'll have to borrow the money from me, but hey I'm a father, so it is my duty to fork it out.

The first is just cool. The Sharp Shooting TV remote. Since part of the job scope for all fathers is the constant care of the TV remote, this just blows my mind. The only problem is you can only set it to do one function, but still it is just a cool gadget. Imagine pointing the device at the TV just like a sheriff, and it comes with a badge too!. I just can't wait til they figure out a way to put in more function into it. Read more about it here.

The second one is also cool, but maybe not for all. This one is limited to smokers. Have you ever had the urge to smoke only to be in a place where smoking is prohibited? Restaurant, LRT, plane, office, etc? Well with this gadget, you can smoke anywhere, and without annoying anyone with your smoke. Read more about it here.

You can also check out both of these gadgets here.

Anyway, HAPPY FATHER'S DAY to all fathers.....

Wanna get shocked on Friday the 13th???

We went to watch the new Indiana Jones movie a last week. Right at the end there was a scene where 'Mutt' (portrayed by Shea LeBouf - I think that's how it's spelled) caught sight of Indy's fedora and picked it up to try it on, and just as it seemed that he would place it on the top of his head, and pressumably hint at being the 'next' Indy, the Real Indy snatched it from him, and off course the fedora was now on his head, ending any speculation on who would be the 'next' Indy.

Anyway, as far as I'm concerned, if Shea is unavailable, I'm ready 24-7.....

How's that for a shocker!!!

MyHeritage: Family tree - Genealogy - Celebrity

Song Dedication

It happened again. I got called by the boss again. To discuss strategic issues for end 2008 and 2009. Again.

Migraine again. Feel like wanna shit again. So many things to think about using a mind trying to be idle.

But the kicker...... just before we concluded the discussion, he told me he wanted to dedicate a song to me.

The song? Kenny Rogers' "Lucille".

You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille
Four hungry children and the crops in the field
I've had some bad times
Lived thru some sad times
But this time your hurtin' won't heal
You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille

What da fock? Do I like look like a Lucille? Lucille Ball? Lu see my balls? Maybe I kick your balls?

Bloody hell.... maybe you've eaten one too many roasters la macha.... the charcoal messing up whatever brain you have left la..

You think I cair tangkap leleh or what? Maybe if you brought some roasters, after makan I can tonggeng la kot?

Haram jadah lakhanat mangkuk hayun macibai macauhai kunji nai puta capuri.

You've focked me so many times already upside the head, tak puas lagi ka macha?

Argh I've got a headache - Help!

Headache lah. Why? Coz of my dilemma, that's why.

What is my dilemma? Here's where I need help, input from others.

I've resigned from my current job, and waiting for about 2 more months before I can cha-alip-bot.

But somehow, to quote Paris Hilton's other sister, "they're still milking me for what I'm worth here".

Maybe even more than I'm worth, damn it.

For those of you who malas to think so much, I'll give you multiple choice.

So, do I:-

A) Do a real good job - Stick to it until the last day, as it is my duty to do each and everything that the company asks me to do so long as I am still under their payroll.

B) Do a so-so job - Do it simple and straight to the point, no need to be real detailed/focused, even if there are some mistakes, so that it looks as though I'm still doing my job, but actually it is just to release a cough at the stairs.

C) Do a bad job - Do it the simplest way in the shortest time, regardless of right or wrong, as long as something comes out after the number-crunching and leave the results for others to interpret and rectify if needed.

D) Don't do it - Leave the company and bear the legal consequences should the company pursue that avenue.

E) Other - Welcome any original and creative ideas that you may have.

And for you lawyers out there, how can I make it 'easy' for me without actually crossing the legal line?

Please help me if you can, while I go to that special room for a bit of thinking.

Porcelain Thoughts

As usual, I find myself on the procelain throne, fiddling with either my phone or my thoughts..... and since I only need maybe 3 minutes tops to check Facebook on the phone.....that leaves quite some time to think. Bull shit or elephant shit, it's all the same shit.

First I'm thinking that I have 70 days to go before I am officially resigned. Now minus the weekends and public holidays from that figure and it's closer to about 50 days only. That is about 10 weekends to go. About 20 bus rides to and fro. Whoa, lama lagi tu.

At least one of my colleagues here whom recently resigned, the company actually paid them in lieu, meaning gaji dapat kerja takpayah. Supposedly, the top management didn't want him still in the company as he was instigating mass exodus, duri dalam daging kononnya. How can I get to be like that? I also want to calo la.... but as my luck would have it, no such thing.

Just this morning the mangkuk hayun boss of mine called me and a couple other 'managers' - mind you I am not even that, to discuss some future plans for the company. Hallo? Macha? Gua dah resign lagi mau kasik kerja ka? Some more the stuff that was discussed mostly involved plans for the 4th quarter of 2008, a period in which I definitely will not be involved anymore. So why? The way I see it, he still needs me and my input, unless he just wants to look at my cibai face for kicks.

If that is the case, no wonder la when I come to work late, or balik awal, or don't show up at all, he doesn't complain. He still needs my input la kot. In that case, I'll make it a point to come a bit late everyday, and go back to KL early on friday. Ok apa, flexi-time. Bloody hell, he's asking about this cost la, that opportunity la, some other contingency plan la, these people la, those articles la, fuck la dei. Lagi may resign lagi mau pening ka. If not for the fact that if I did not do these things, the impact might affect the periuk nasi of about 1,300 families, then I might just have cabut, and bear the consequences of not serving out the 3 months notice. I have other things to think about, like my efforts towards a bigger family, a better home, diving certification, maybe even pick up golfing again. Aah.... but that's just about what I had time to think about.... then I had to istinjak and flush.... nanti sudah kering kalu leceh.

Wonder who else thinks about bullshit stuff while on the porcelain throne? Or is it ceramic? I didn't think about that.....

Takde kerja la ni

Aktuelinye..... aku dah tender resignation nak dekat sebulan dah kot, tapi sebab notis 3 bulan, dok ada lagi 2 bulan lah nak kena berlakon. Ingatkan dah tender tu clear la, rupenye bos mangkuk aku tu ada lagi bagi assignment - dah tau nak pakai lagi aku, awat tak kasik naik gaji awai-awai, tak pun cari lah pengganti cepat-cepat. Tu lah kaum Christopher George, cuma tak tukar nama je lagi, tapi bahasa dah lupa dah.

Lantak pi la, kalau aku tak siap pun bukan dia boleh buat apa. Cuma aku buat jugak la, sebab nanti rezeki tak halal pulak, tapi lebih-lebih takdak la, cukup sekadar secukup rasa. So, memandangkan aku duduk dalam bilik ni tutup lampu (save cost - dan juga supaya orang ingat takde orang dan tak singgah), aku akan balance balik cost tu dengan mengesurf internet, dan apa yang aku sudah jumpa, memang best.

Mula-mula aku saja nak surf cari diving parafanelia... camna nak eja malas nak spell check... ingat kot semua lebih kurang macam gambar ni le....

Rupanya, memang power..... macam-macam benda ada, cuma duit je la takde.... tapi bak kata orang duit boleh dicari....

So kalau ada duit aku nak beli benda ni la, cool gila, macam-macam nombor ada, mintak nombor ekor pun boleh, dah la 18k gold... baru la Paris Hilton kot... ke tak lagi?

Lepas tu dive kalu musti ada ambience power punye...mp3 la beb... apa laga.....

Kot-kot mau communicate dengan other divers, boleh pakai ini simple sms punye gadget.... rupa dia pelik sikit la, kot-kot makcik-makcik yang bawak kereta sensorang boleh pakai, tak tau la kan..... I baru amatur belum legend lagi...

Takpun kalau nak phone member yang tak diving, pakai ni terus la.... tunggu apa lagi?

"Yo watper beb, blub, wa underwadder ni, 40 meter wa cakap sama lu...blub.... wa tengok ikan ni fobia lak... macam muka monyet...blub"

Dan masa dive tu mesti la nak nampak macam superunderwaterspy.... pakai goggle/mask ini macam la kawan....

Kalau rasa macam tak best, cuba tengok inside la kawan.... ada HUD ooooo..... giler bester...... macam Streehawk pulak rasa...

Letih kalu..... ni ada cara bergaya bergerak dalam air tanpa berenang.....

Kalau letih jugak, sampai lelah dan asthma.... pakai snorkel ni sudah la.... kalau tak pam ventolin siap-siap... atau apa-apa gas lain yang sewaktu dengannya.... tak pun bubuh sekali dalam tank mix dengan oksigen dan nitrogen ... lagi senang.... kena la orang calculate RVT pulak untuk ventolin tu.....

Gila best.... puas hati aku duduk kat ofis tapi tak buat kerja ofis..... tapi buat jugak la sebenornya....

Kasik la can, bak kata omputih, swimming while drinking the wadder..... saya budak baru belajar, kalau salah tolong tunjukkan....

TGV the Correct Swinging Plate


Punya la seronok bawak anak-beranak serta maid nak pegi tengok wayang kat Capital Square.
Tengok dalam paper, cerita Narnia yang baru to start pukul 12.20.


By the time semua siap, dah pukul 11.55, so apa laga, bawak kereta macam F1 la mencelah situ-sini.
Bukannya apa, best tengok wayang kat Capital Square sebab tempat tu tak siap lagi, so tak ramai orang.
Sebelum ni dua kali dah pergi tengok wayang kat situ, both times, boleh kira dengan tangan orang dalam panggung tu.

So anyway, kalut-kalut pun sampai kat counter beli tiket to pukul 12.10, so kira ok la. Sempat la. Beli tiket, papkon, etc.

Tapi panggung punggung mangkuk tu sudah tukar time la.... show pukul 3.00, ada ke patut. Mangkuk hayun betul
Habih tu aku nak buat apa lagi 2 jam lebih takkan nak melangut kat Capital Square tu dah la takde kedai apa pun.
Dah la bawak anak yang buas dan memang no way boleh nak duduk diam tunggu sampai pukul 3.00.


Habis tu, balik rumah la. Nak round-round pun minyak mahal. Lahanat punya TGV. Mangkuk hayun punya punggung wayang.
Nak je aku kung fu panda puak-puak kat TGV tu, tapi kawe tok panda kung fu. Mangkuk Hayun betul.

ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A 5 YEAR OLD?

I am not trying to copy the similarly named redneck show hosted by Jeff Foxworthy or the one ciplaked (is that a word?) by mix.fm, or one of those ASTRO-based radios channels. I am really talking about being smarter than a 5 year old.

Here is the story.

I'm sure most of you remember the good old days of being a child old enough to watch and comprehend TV shows, yet not old enough to be really responsible for anything other than not peeing or shitting in your pants. And then I'm sure some of you also remember the superb and mindblowing TV shows which we were addicted to, and better still, companies like HASBRO, MATTEL, etc, cashed in on this by producing almost-exact-replica toys, on sale in a toy store near you. Gila best, MASK, G.I JOE, GoBOTS, THUNDERCATS, SILVERHAWKS, VOLTRON, ROBOTECH, TRANSFORMERS, the list is endless. To a wide-eyed young child, how better to realize all those animated-fantasies if not thru cool action figures! My poor parents had to hear me nag them to get all the above-mentioned toys, at whatever measly salary they were pulling in, patutla always make lame excuses not to buy me toys.

And now the circle of life has come full circle.... I'm the one pulling in the measly salary, and hence making lame excuses to my son why I can't buy him a truckload of toys every week.

"Kedai tak bukak lagi la..."

"Toy tu tak jual la..... advert tu untuk overseas aje..."

"Duit takdela, habis beli susu and pampers....."

"Kedai tu tak bagi budak-budak yang tak makan sayur beli toy..."

And worse still, there are even more cartoons nowadays, with toy-tie-ins, and bloody expensive mind you..... apa buat toy kena pakai petrol ka?

But anyway, anak punya pasal, today me and the missus gave in to his constant nagging to buy Bumblebee.

For those of you not in the know, it is a character from the movie "Transformers". Cost almost as much as a full tank on my car. Also, it was slighly cheaper the last time I checked the price, which was last 2 weeks maybe, so I'm guessing it has got something to do with the price increase of petrol.... maybe.....

Anyway, the story doesn't end there. I thought that by buying that toy, my son would be off my case for at least a week. Sooo wrong was I. Off course it is always the fathers job to help transform the toy from CAR MODE to ROBOT MODE. I wouldn't complain if it was easy, but the powers that be who created the toy, not only wanted my hard earned cash, but also my sanity.

Why do I say this? Let me take you through the 10 steps to insanity.

The first 3 steps are basically self-explanatory. You just kepak the doors ever-so-slightly and pull them outwards a couple of notches, and pry open the roof of the car horizontally, then rotate them at about a 35 degree angle to the horizontal. With me so far?

Then you pull apart the butt side of the car so that the phallic-o-booster slides out and drops out. OK?

After putting aside that thing that pooped out, you simply rotate the doors 180 degrees on the Z-axis, and pull out the sun-roof-like piece so that it is raised. You finish the move of by twisting the doors sideways so that look like wings, and at the same time pull out the hands and arms which are hidden under the roof. Also pull out some of your hair and a rabbit from your rear end.

Then you twist the top part so the bottom part is aligned with the parts on the side, and the head will appear just as your head is about to blow up. Then both the left arm and the right arm are adjusted so they appear parallel to the chestal cross section of the robot's torso, and stick a fork in your chest. What?

Just a little bit more. Drag the piece holding the rear tires perpendicular to the part that will be the robot's knees, and then pull it back down so that it appears longer than the shorter drawing on the left, at the same time shove a butter knife up your own rear end.

Last but not least, stick the piece that pooped out earlier into the right hand of the robot, and your child is ready for the time of his life playing with this toy.

In reality nothing could be further from the truth. The toy in robot mode was not ready. The insructions sucked! Thankfully I had time on my side, sent my son of to watch a cartoon show or two, threw away the instructions, stared at every piece and moving part on the damned thing, and tried my best to figure out how to do what I was supposed to do.

In the end, my fantasticall mind prevailed, but barely at the edge of sanity. I don't remember my toys back in the day to be so complicated. Why sell a toy to a 5 year old, which he himself can't manipulate? Is it so that the father-son bond can be built? Is it so that the kid will get frustrated, and break or trash it, and ask for another one, further increasing sales for the toy company?

Why? Why? Why?

Anyway, as I managed to do it by myself, I can proudly say that I, the father, am smarter than a 5 year old, the son.

Hahaha.

Now I only have to figure out how to turn the robot back into a car.

On my own. By myself.

And also do it again and again everytime my son asks me to do it everytime he plays we the toy.

Or I can just persuade him to just play with the robot versions, and never to dream of the car versions ever.

Right.

Guess who's the smart one now? I retract my earlier statement of being smarter than a 5 year old.

In this wonderful world of ours, just like in the situation I found myself in with the toy, it is always the 'smarter' ones that end up doing all the work while the others just give orders. Right? Think about it.

THE ILL IN ILLINOIS

Some of the best moments of my life happened during my college days, at the often misspelled and mispronounced University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign (UIUC). Don't even start with the jokes.

Anyway, those were the days, not too many worries, no parents to nag you, the list is endless. Also, I'm sure there are a lot of you, whom like me, found the love of their lives during college. So did I. I got my first Playstation when I was in the US.

Anyway, let's not go there. My main point is, I am actually a bit proud to be a graduate from UIUC, but I just came across this site, where you will find some 'funky' news from my Alma Mater......

Here is an excerpt taken from the above-mentioned site.

A University of Illinois (U of I) research project that converts swine manure to crude oil could be a surprising key to reduced crude oil imports and could possibly create a new industry in the U.S.U of I agricultural engineer Yuanhui Zwang has refined a thermochemical conversion (TCC) process to make it more efficient and faster.

Well, for now I'll just focus on my own skills of producing this much fangled manure (not that gay team from Manchester, although they're the same as shit....), and hope that these brilliant researchers come up with a way to convert my shit into fuel. And if they pay for test-subjects, I'm available any time.

LATEST OIL-PRICE RELATED UPDATE

This one is especially for women-folk who think this here bloke is HOT.

Apparently our country's oil stock pile is all in his hair.

Just manja-manja a bit and gosok-gosok his kepala and you'll get all the oil you need.

Just makes sure the kepala with hair....

For more interesting tips for surviving this oil-crisis, check out Lilytheliverbird's blog site, also where I got this pic.

WE BE JAMMIN'

Gila apa? Cibai la. Dah lama dah duk dengaq kata harga minyak nak naik, tapi tak sangka pulak tetiba tengah-tengah minggu dia announce mengejut! Ataupun mungkin aku je jenis tak sempat baca paper atau tengok berita kot.... entahla.... tak kira la bukan salah aku, semua mesti salah orang lain... baru la malaysian......

Sebenarnya harga minyak nak naik ni aku bukan peduli sangat pun, sebab bukannya localized, tapi global event.... tapi sebab orang dah kata semua ni salah kerajaan, apa lagi, hantam saja la.... cibai... aku rasa aku nak propose kat gomen suruh depa increase price minyak lagi, around biar jadik RM8.00 seliter ke, ok apa, tapi bagi subsidi pulak dekat harga rokok, so that RM8.20 sekotak jadik RM1.00 sekotak ke, baru puas hati..... cibai....

Apa pun aku still tak pueh hati...cibai...... sebabnya aku nak isi minyak bukan nak save duit ke apa ke..... ye la kan, kalau berebut isi minyak semalam pun, boleh lah save RM50 ke.... that one time only la... tapi nak kena beratur, nak kena tunggu entah berapa jam, nak kena layan kerenah orang, nak kena maintain cool cut line, tak pun nak kena sabar kena potong line, lepas tu nak kena ration lak, takeh full tank, dengar kata limit RM50 satu kereta, tak tau la......

Aku punya tank dah kosong dah....cibai..... lampu warning menyala semenjak terbit matahari, tapi aku ni pulak malas nak isi time pagi, suara hati kata petang aja la, time balik kerja. Ha nah kau...... semua stesyen minyak penuh berderet kereta tunggu, dari petang sampai ke malam.... cibai la lu orang... dalam stesyen tu kereta semua rapat-rapat takut nanti tiba-tiba harga naik kot.... cibai.... lepas tu kat luar stesyen dia punya line nak tunggu sampai lepas dua-tiga simpang...cibai..... gua punye minyak dah tenat ni, nanti kena tolak kereta pulak leceh. Kalau harga rokok murah takpe le jugak...... nasib baik sempat bertahan sampai pagi ni.... untung gak duk loqstaq ni, kalau kat KL mau dah tersadai kat mana-mana.... cibai.....

TIME TO GO

Sometimes you just know you've been too long somewhere.

I speak as if I am a Kedahan born-and-bred, and I know some Kedahans who don't speak with the northern accent.

I've actually been mistaken for a Kedahan going to KL on holiday rather than a KL boy stuck working in Kedah.

I'm also now tuned to jokes which are only heard at gerai-gerai tepi jalan Putra at night.... jokes which are of a different wavelength from those which were previously associated with me....

I also do not need to order anything when frequenting the above-mentioned gerai-gerai, since the know my usual drink the moment they see my car, to the extent that if I want another type of drink, kena kensel lah sebab dah hantaq dah teh o ais...

Worse still, since most of the gerai-gerai are in close proximity to each other, kalau parking near gerai A, but intend to lepak at gerai B, the fella at gerai A sudah kasik bikin teh o ais la.....

But what I experienced this morning takes the cake. I looked down on my office chair, and saw the ultimate proof that I've been here too long and need to get out......

SCUBA Diving is to snorkeling what non-stop sex with a supermodel is to a 5-minute quickie with a pillow.

No offence to those more inclined towards snorkeling, and definitely no offence to the Lord of Snorkeling, but after planning and talking about taking up SCUBA Diving with my wife for ages, I finally found the time to leave 'my wife' behind to sneak a getaway with a certain Liverpool Babe, and went for a Diving weekend in Perhentian Island, as they call it.

As you can probably deduce from the title of this blog, there's just no words to explain it. I know all those 'experienced' divers will probably laugh and say that this budak lebih-lebih pulak, but I speak from the heart. I know that apparently as a snorkeler, there is a higher probability of seeing a shark above water, but with SCUBA diving you get to take a BAS under water.... and do it deeper... whatever la.

It all starts with some basics for Diving, such as sucking on a plastic thingy and blowing into a bigger plastic thingy. All this while on your knees.

Then once the basic few steps are ok, all that is left is to go for a real dive, at a real dive site, albeit for beginners, but it sure beat scrapping your knees just a few feet from the beach. So there we were, Liverpool Babe and myself, maybe 10 meters or a bit more under the waterline, if that's the term, looking at fish poo, and all the other beautiful undersea treasures.

If you're already an experienced diver, maybe my babblings on this topic is not worth anything, but for those of you who have never tried diving, let me paint a picture for you, from a guy's point of view. If you have one from a girl's point of view, you're welcomed to submit it to me.

For Guys. When you snorkel it's basically quite noisy and a bit of effort to breathe, not to mention salty. And you choke more often than not. It's like going down on a wet woman with a funky puss, in the middle of a busy Mumbai intersection. Not good. But diving, let me put it this way, imagine yourself, a supermodel and the magical 69, such that every part of your body is embraced in a tight but loving way, and all the time all the noise in the world is muffled, as your ears are now covered, and your mouth is resting on a warm and moist spot for respiration. Ok maybe you get the occassional salty after-taste, but overall good scenario. And the view is just out of this world. And if the above is not for you, you can always rotate, and muffle the sound some other creative way, which I'm sure I don't have to spell out.

Then again maybe I'm the only one who gets turned on by the whole diving experience. I'm weird that way.

Anyway, on a little bit more serious note, the whole diving experience is really refreshing to the soul in a way that I imagine yoga or meditation is. You are really left in a world of your own, despite having other people around you, it seems as though you are invisible, except to a few of the sea-creatures and bottom-dwellers. AND the noise is minimal, you can really only hear your breathing and your own heartbeat, when was the last time you can truely say you experienced that? AND being in the ocean (cue chorus from OCEAN DEEP by Lord of the Snorkels) somehow gives you the feeling of being able to reach any point that you can see, and in fact actually being able to, total freedom of movement in all axes. AND nobody can talk to you, not that I don't like conversation, but there is a value in silence that sometimes gets lost in our normal daily lives.

So those of you who already dive, teach me more and bring me to the next level!

Those of you who haven't, what are you waiting for?

By the way, you can still maintain vogue when diving, ok? Pornstars can wear aah this kind of shoes???