Killing time...

What to do to kill time? I've got about 72,000 minutes of official working time to kill.

Whenever I'm alone, I usually talk to myself, and you might think me crazy, anf really I have no motivation to argue on that point. In fact I'd probably tend to agree. I'm an only child, and for a majority of my childhood in a shroud of mystery for outsiders looking in, so it comes with the territory. Look at it this way, it's a way better situation to explain if you're talking to yourself, as opposed to talking to the chair or fridge. Maybe.

That's why I guess this blogging activity is sort of talking to myself, but on a more advanced technological level. I am sure one or two people who stumbled across this blog would agree. I am basically talking to myself, but using my fingers and the keyboard to convey the message.

In kind of a wierd way, I like talking to myself, and still do occassionally. It helps me 'rehearse' or 'prepare' for certain situations or conversations. I can also argue with myself and not worry about the arguement getting too carried away, for sure it will never end up in death, so that's ok I guess, and most of the time we get to a compromise... I mean I get to it.

So the latest non-blog-self-discussion I had was concerning the positions we assume to pass motion.

The sitting vs squatting discussion.

I am comfortable with both methods, as both have their pros and cons.

When sitting, you need to make sure that the surface is at the cleanest it can be, as it has the most skin-to-toilet contact. In this position, you have plenty of manouverability for your arms, and can get away with reading, sudoku-ing, and even the occassional facebook updating or even blogging. It's even better if you can rest your back against the toilet seat cover, or something. Personally, when in this position I prefer to slouch to the front and rest my elbows on my knees, and read or whatever, but this usually cuts of circulation to the feet, and at the end of the session I usually end up with dead legs, and have trouble to stand up after washing, so really need to be careful here otherwise could maybe fall down or something worse. For the really kinky you can also have a partner in there with you, helping you upload while you download. Maybe.

When squatting, you have the least skin-to-toilet contact, and plus it is just your feet, so you can wash that later with not too many problems, also sometimes you've got shoes or slippers on, so that's ok. In this position you can't really use a laptop, since you have no 'lap' area to put it on, but I guess you still could, albeit with a little bit more effort, but you run the risk of the laptop slipping off your knees or something, and end up with a hard time explaining to the repair guy what happened. While squatting, you can't really rest your back on the toliet, well you can actually, it is just that you'd be a bit off-balanced. Plus, if you're squatting on a sitting toilet, you risk slipping and falling off it, or worse, if it breaks, you might end up with a hard time explaining to the nurse/doctor how you injured your backside. In general, you can still read, or get a round of sudoku in, but for me personally, after some time, your arms get tired really quick, and anyway, since the hips and knees are bent, circulation is cut off and I end up with dead legs.So what's the score? For me, I end up with dead legs in both positions, so next I think I'll try a bed pan and do it lying down. Maybe. But supposedly, there has been research into this, and it seems the colon is in a better position when you squat. I guess that's why it is sunnah, huh? Anyway, just like sex, shitting for me is an end that justifies the means, as long as I get to do it, it doesn't matter what position, hantam saja, does that make sense? Is that even the right way to say it?

Let me discuss that with me for a bit and I'll get back to me....

UPDATE

For those of you who can't stand the sight of shit, look away, coz I finally remembered to take a pic after a dump....

You can't really see from the pic, but I had to control my 'squeeze muscles' so that the whole thing came out as ONE PIECE.... as you can see one end is sticking out of the water surface, almost like the head of a whale peering out of the sea, while the other end is actually hidden inside the toliet piping, so what you see is maybe only 70% of the whole thing. Could've pushed out more in that one motion, but I sorta sneezed and let go of my 'squeeze muscles'......

If you're gagging in disgust, too bad......